Substance abuse may appear to be an individual issue. It’s the user who is consuming the substance. The user is the one who feels the physical effects and has to live with the consequences.
Unfortunately, the story doesn’t stop there. Substance abuse is a whole family issue. There are many serious implications for the family as a unit.
How Addiction Affects Children
Studies show one out of eight children live in a household where a parent abuses substances. When one or both parents are struggling with addiction, the child doesn’t grow up having the reliable adult to turn to for support.
The home environment is often unpredictable, and at times unsafe. There are inconsistent behaviors, secrecy, and a larger burden placed on the child. Children in these households experience role reversal and are forced to become adults before they should be.
How Addiction Affects Parental Relationships
Parents who are dealing with a child who is struggling from substance abuse are often filled with worry and a constant dread that the worst will come true. All parents worry about their children, but this takes it up plenty of notches.
Parents often feel a guilt or sense of responsibility for what their child is going through. There’s a powerless sense of suffering while watching their child go through this type of struggle. They may even wonder where they went wrong in their child’s upbringing. In an effort to help, certain behaviors can be counterproductive and end up enabling more than helping.
How Addiction Affects Siblings
When one sibling is suffering from substance abuse, much of the focus inadvertently shifts to them. As a result, the other siblings become sidelined for attention.
There’s often a variety of emotions, including confusion, resentment, fear, and frustration. This abusing behavior sets a certain example, and can either ward off or suck others in. When a sibling has an abuse/addiction issue, there is a higher likelihood for other siblings to follow in those footsteps.
Familial Changes
Trust among family members is important and typically instilled naturally until broken. Substance abuse often leads to scheming, sneaking, and lying behaviors, which can result in others being let down and promises being broken. Then family trust issues ensue.
Dealing with addiction and substance abuse can also increase stress levels for everyone involved. Trying to correct behavior can increase tension between the person suffering and the one trying to help. Watching as a bystander can be stressful, especially when there’s a helpless feeling with it. Enabling behaviors from the family can become stressful when the desired effect isn’t the outcome.
These tensions can boil over and result in physical and/or emotional abuse. Either party can play the role of the abuser depending on the situation.
One obvious, but often overlooked side effect of substance abuse is the financial implication. Substances aren’t cheap and require steady money to maintain use. The depths to which someone may go to continue that habit can be detrimental.
Family Roles in Addiction
When substance abuse affects a family, there are different roles that each person may assume. There’s the addict who struggles with the abuse problem.
There’s a caretaker role, who takes on responsibilities to cover or makes excuses for the behaviors. This is the person who may accidentally enable the substance use.
There’s a hero role, who helps maintain stability within the family, but doesn’t enable. Sometimes, someone assumes the role of the scapegoat. This person tries to draw attention away from the addict by demonstrating disruptive behaviors of their own.
There may be a mascot, who tries to make light of the situation and use humor to offset the negative aura.
Finally, there’s a lost member who avoids the difficult situations.
Each of these roles may be ever evolving, but also come with consequences and side effects of their own for the non-addicts.
Is your family experiencing hardships because of substance abuse? Contact us to learn more about family therapy.
